The Real Reasons Women Under 30 Aren't Having Sex

According to a study group of new young women between the ages of 18 and 30 years suffer from low libido at prices never seen before: 43% of women have sexual problems, they say. And one in 10 women do not want to have sex, a recent ABC News trumpeted.

The strange thing is the fact that women report what experts like to call "sexual dysfunction", but that young women is that: Generally, we think of sexual matters as the stuff that hits to that distributed in-40.

But now they are blaming sexperts 20-somethings with low libido in everything from stress (we are concerned about our jobs or work more hours) for birth control / antidepressant (both are potent chemical cocktail that can make lust dry), and, well, Hollywood:

"Young women feel pressure to be sex pots," uttered in the history sexperto ABC.

Of course, there is no media out there that do not like to start a story: "In the dorms across the country ...", well, in our mind, the real question is: Which of these theories are true, which are mere media propaganda, and what you can do to keep your sex life hot? Dr. Debby Herbenick, a sexual health educator and researcher at the Kinsey Institute, author of because it feels good: a woman's guide to sexual pleasure and satisfaction, gives it to you directly.

But please, comments, choose an anonymous ID, and tell us all about her sex life - or lack thereof.


Lemondrop: What do you think of these studies reporting low desire in women who are at the age of performance for the action?
Herbenick: It's hard for us to say how much this has changed over time because we have good data on it for years. But we do know that there are some young women who really have a problem with sexual desire and running for life ...

We also know that the desire tends to decline in long-term relationships, so you can be young and healthy and fit, but you still may experience a decrease in desire longer you stay with someone if you are a woman or a man . Also recently, as they have a focus on the desire and many discussions about low libido, women have many more questions, if your desire is at the appropriate level. We're seeing a lot more upset than we used.

Let's talk about Hollywood for a minute. Do you really think the entertainment industry is partly to blame?
Of course. We see people who are always ready to have sex in the cinema and television, as if sex is always the first priority in the lives of people. But we know that is simply not the case, and should not be. Worrying about work and school have priority. These stresses of life take their toll on sleep and food and stress - and sex too.

Is there a link between birth control and low sexual desire?
Some studies have found that some women, not all, to experience decreased sexual desire after starting the pill. Unfortunately, many researchers have tried to do it anymore, but have not succeeded in getting funding because, as you can imagine, has not been much interest from pharmaceutical companies to investigate this and to make these products.

What about women who take antidepressants?
We know that for some women on antidepressants, sexual problems are common side effects, including difficulty with orgasm.

How much do you think the inability to orgasm is associated with low sexual desire?
May be related, but certainly there are many women who enjoy sex or not having an orgasm, it is difficult for many men to understand. If you are a woman who is accustomed to having orgasms or orgasms that are important, and you do not have one, then the desire might be affected the next time you have sex. But also, sex can not be nice if they feel connected to your partner. And on average, women have less sexual desire than men, and sometimes that leads to what they feel is "gender duty" or obligation sex, and starts this cycle of terror. In general, there may be many reasons why you lose the desire.

What advice would you give women who suffer from low libido?
I often ask women if it is a problem for them or a problem because they think they are disappointing their partner. You should also look at what has changed in their lives: Am I tired? Am I stressed? "I just had a baby? Often, lifestyle habits are strongly related to sex, but really undervalued. If you think your partner wants it more than you, talk to your partner. Sometimes he does not know, and well. You can do more together.

As for what it can do more research mindfulness techniques can help. Women are very prone to cognitive distractions - worrying about clothes, worry about children, worry about school, instead of focusing on sex. Instead, you should focus on how the leaves on your skin feel, how your partner's skin and hair smell and feel to kiss and touch them. Is really focused on those things can help you find the desire in sex again.

There is also research on storytelling techniques. Sometimes when approaching our partner we think: "Oh, no, he wants sex again. All he wants is sex." And that's a negative story. But if you can replace it with a positive story as: "He thinks I'm so hot, he can not resist," we find that positive stories sexy can help women feel in the mood.

There are still plenty of talk about female viagra. What about taking a medicine that aims to increase the desire?
For some women, medication can be helpful if nothing else really works. But I think it would be wrong if drugs were the first line of treatment, since they have decades of knowledge that sex therapy and cognitive functions well can operate more technical. Most of these are the things about relationships: If you do not feel loved or desired or special for your partner or are condescending to you, a pill will not work.